Hacking Part 3

Rose went out with her friends and left me all alone with her mum. I understand the human need to... I don't know, shall we say group? Yes, group sounds quite good. Someone called Shareen who I've heard about and Keisha who I've met. I don't think she was entirely planning on going out but now she has, they've gone to some pub or another and I had nothing better to do than eat digestive biscuits and watch telly with Jackie while she talked about how it was like 'the good old days'. I suppose the good old days are before I came into the picture, but I always did get the impression that Rose enjoyed time and space and visiting places and running and trouble and everything that comes along. In fact she's said several times, usually when we're about to die, but still she's said!

But anyway, I got bored of whatever soap it was that Jackie had on and decided to poke around a bit, she was none too happy when she found me going through the bathroom cupboard, but it was fascinating! I've never seen so many creams and lotions and things! It seems remarkable that humans are so obsessed with staying hydrated when they're seventy percent water to begin with. If they actually kept themselves hydrated then they wouldn't have dehydrated skin! But Jackie caught me sticking my finger in a pot of something called 'Under Eye Anti-wrinkle Cream' and was very displeased.

But all this got me thinking that I'd like to scientifically look at the human aging process. It's not as if I am unaware of how it works or anything, I've been around enough human beings to know that, but it never really seemed all that important before. So I told Jackie I was going to do repairs and went to the TARDIS to begin my observations.

Humans have an average life expectancy of approximately 66.12 Earth years, though to be fair that factors in all sorts of places on Earth, being technically European, Rose can expect probably about 77 years, average. But then again, seeing as though she has access to medicine, foods, and technology from the future she might have a good 100 years in her, maybe more. That leaves 80 more of them left for adventures.

Eighty years.

Eighty years!

That is a dismally small number. I don't quite like the sound of it. And that doesn't even take into account the aging process.

So, I took a photo of Jackie and a photo of Rose and put them together:


Well, I suppose Jackie doesn't look too bad for... I don't know, how old is Jackie now? 55? 58? I suppose she's not so bad for human years. But I think maybe I should tell Rose not to cake on the makeup so well, sometimes Jackie looks like she's stuck the White Cliffs of Dover under her eyes. This might require more research.

Oh. ....There is knocking on the TARDIS door. Why is there knocking on the TARDIS door? Well, one way to find out I suppose.

Cheerio! I should say that more often, cheerio!

This is the Doctor by the way.